Things Are Getting Pretty Serious

Just a quick note: I’m writing this post as I watch the national championship game between Oklahoma and Florida (trust me I’m struggling through it, but the Office is a repeat and there is nothing else worth watching on). You know, college football already has enough working against it as it is. Every year, the question of is the BCS champion the real national champion? is always pondered, and lots of years a “split” national championship is settled upon. That’s absolute crap, and that is why college football sucks. I feel like this is what would happen if Donovan McNabb was in charge of college football, but alas he is not, and it still happens. Whatever, I’m past it. PIIIICKS

The first game of the divisional round is going to be an absolute slugfest. They’ll be more hitting and fighting than actual football playing when Baltimore takes on Tennessee, but then again, isn’t that what football is really all about? I expect a similar game to their matchup from the regular season which the Titans won 13-10.
It makes me nervous to take Kerry Collins against the Ravens in the playoffs (see Super Bowl XXXV), but I think I’d be more nervous taking the rookie Joe Flacco against the Titans defense. Both teams are awesome on defense, both teams can pound the running game, but I say the gray beard (Collins) wins a squeaker at home with the crowd behind him. The X-Factor however, is Ed Reed. He’s the man. I really just can’t use words to describe how incredible he is, but I’ll just leave it at that. Also, when I see him have returns like this one last week, I wonder why they don’t use him on special teams more, or on offense. Regardless, he’s the reason why I’m taking Baltimore (+3) to cover.

On the flipside, I don’t see a repeat game of the Cardinals-Panthers regular season game happening tonight. Carolina was 8-0 at home this year, and Arizona was 3-5 on the road. Carolina will shove the ball down the Cardinals throat with Williams and Stewart, who will probably have about a buck-fifty each, and when the Cardinals put eight men in the box? Well then Steve Smith will be there to burn them. I think the Panthers win big, so I’m going with Carolina (-10). Don’t underestimate the combo of Smith-Muhammed in the playoffs. It’s deadly.

I still think that the Giants are the team to beat in the NFC, and the entire league as well, and I don’t trust Philly; not one bit. I think Philly could go 16-0 and tear up the league, but if Andy Reid was still their coach and McNabb was still their QB I would continue to bet against them. Because the Giants lost three of their last four (even though none of them mattered except the game they won against Carolina) and the Eagles beat the Giants at the Meadowlands a few weeks ago, I’ll pick Philadelphia (+4) to cover. But I still have a feeling the G-men will pull it out.

I’m not buying the whole “San Diego is hot” thing (even though they are). The Chargers always play the Steelers tough, Big Ben is banged up, and…Mike Scifres is perhaps the greatest punter ever. I am confident in saying he will be the very first kicker elected into the Hall of Fame. I would bet a moderate amount of money on it (maybe like $20). He will give the Chargers a huge edge in the field position battle. But if I know one thing it’s that you don’t bet against the league’s #1 defense at home in the playoffs…straight up at least. I’ll take San Diego (+6) to cover. I missed the cover on this game in the regular season when Pitt won 11-10 and Polamalu’s return for TD as time expired didn’t count when it should have. This game will be pretty similar, and I will have my redemption.

So I’m taking three underdogs with the spread, but not to win straight up. That is some very risky business, but hey, all that matters is the spread anyways. If one of them wins outright, I still win. Beautiful.

Oh, yeah, and that all-disappointment team is still in the workings and on its way soon. I’m really building the suspense with that one. You people can’t even sit still waiting for it. I can feel it.

Wild Card Weekend

Okay so just disregard the regular season. As any respectable coach would tell you, playoffs are a new season. Everyone is 0-0, and if you lose, you’re going home. I’d like to take that same approach here. After a regular season which I would like to forget, I’m going to use the playoffs as my rebound. Granted I did so poorly because I missed several weeks, but I’m not one for excuses. I was going to refuse to make playoff picks as a “f--- you” to the league for their extremely questionable rules regarding which teams make the postseason. I mean I am livid. The Patriots win their last four games and finish 11-5, and miss out. Yet, the Chargers, who won their last four games to finish just 8-8, not only get in but get to host a wild card game. Not to mention that none of their four victories were over playoff teams, and included was a one point victory over 2-14 Kansas City. But you know what, I’m passed all that for two reasons: 1) I love the NFL, and 2) I am a strong believer in karma. The Pats will get theirs when the perfect storm that I discussed a few posts ago is unleashed.

Cardinals (+2.5) over Falcons

Both the NFC games are completely tearing my insides apart. I don’t know who to pick in either matchup. The Cardinals have looked awful lately. I went to the game they played at New England, and it was a complete joke. It was obvious from the opening kickoff they were missing the cozy desert heat, and wanted no part of that Foxboro winter storm. Also, Michael Turner was second in the league with 1,700 rush yards, and the Cardinals rush defense could be gouged by Rashaan Salaam (so pumped I got that reference in there). But still, who’s to say the Cardinals are going to continue the trend they ended the season on? They really had nothing to play for as they had the division wrapped up, so can you blame them for wanting to get the hell out of Massachusetts? (It was absolutely freezing). The Falcons are just 4-4 away from home, and their less-than-stellar pass defense will have trouble stopping the Boldin-Fitzgerald aerial assault. It’s going to be close and high scoring, but I’ll take the home team and the points.

Indianapolis (-3) over San Diego

Yeah…I’m definitely not as worried about the AFC matchups. Indy has won nine in a row, they have the hilarious Peyton Manning (who I guess is pretty good too as he was named MVP), and they are clicking on all cylinders. San Diego has won four straight, but none against playoff teams. And I don’t want to hear this crap about “well they have a lot of talent and they seem to be gelling at the right time.” There is a reason this team started the season 4-8, and LT is still nicked up. To boot, the Chargers are still coached by Norv Turner. Home field advantage will not be enough, and Indy will win by more than just the last second field goal they prevailed by against the Chargers during the regular season. I fully expect this game to reflect the Chargers season- they’ll make stupid mistakes and underachieve to dig themselves into a hole they can’t get out of. Or maybe they’ll self destruct in the fourth quarter. I don’t know. Don’t worry, they’ll lose one way or another.

Baltimore (-2) over Miami

No reason to think that Baltimore won’t see the same result they did when they throttled Miami 27-13 in week 7. Before they lost to Pittsburgh for the second time, I was going to say that the Ravens season was beginning to look eerily similar to their season the year they won the Super Bowl when they quietly won their last seven games with dominating defense to finish 12-4 (minus Trent Dilfer…er, wait, isn’t that a plus?) Still, the Ravens won 5 of their last six and had some impressive performances. Congratulations to Miami on the best turnaround in the history of the NFL (1-15 to 11-5 division champs), but they’ve done that by being efficient, and they really got the most out of their team. Kudos to Pennington, but the Dolphins benefitted from a weak schedule. Also, two point victories over Seattle and Oakland, a four point win over St. Louis, and a five point win over San Francisco make the Dolphins record better than I believe they actually are, in a year where they lost to non-playoff teams in Houston and the NY Jets.

Minnesota (+3) over Philadelphia

I can’t believe I’m actually picking a Tarvaris-Jackson-led team to win a playoff game, but my hands are tied—just look at what the alternative is. I mean there are so many reasons not to pick the Vikings, for instance the fact that Tarvaris Jackson is the quarterback which I just mentioned. Anyone who saw the end of last week’s game against the Giants would cringe at picking a team coached by the clock management wiz Brad Childress. All that being said, I have faith in the Vikings defense and the league’s leading rusher Adrian Peterson, especially at home where they’ve beaten the Panthers, Giants, and Bears. I also have more faith in a team that’s gone 5-1 in their last six games versus Andy Reid and Donovan McNabb. I don’t care what else the Eagles have done; if you watched what they did in consecutive weeks against Baltimore and Cincy you wouldn’t trust them to beat Virginia Tech. I hope it goes into double overtime and McNabb walks off the field thinking the game ended in a tie.

I know the All-Disappointment team has been a disappointment in itself so far, but don’t fret people it’s on its way.

The Suffering Ends

Oakland (+13) over Tampa Bay

Detroit (+11) over Green Bay- Dare I say that the Lions will win and avoid finishing 0-16?

Dallas (+1.5) over Philadelphia- As much as I don’t want to see the Cowboys in the playoffs, I have a feeling that somehow fate will put them there

Minnesota (-7) over NY Giants- G-men will be resting everyone up while the Vikings need to win to get in

Chicago (+3) over Houston

Carolina (-2) over New Orleans- The pattern finally ends as a visiting team wins an NFC South game

Atlanta (-14) over St. Louis

Kansas City (+2.5) over Cincinnati

Baltimore (-11) over Jacksonville

Indianapolis (+3) over Tennessee- Neither team is going to put out there starters, who knows what’s going to happen

Pittsburgh (-11) over Cleveland- I would take any team in the league -11 over the Browns right now

NY Jets (-3) over Miami- Come on Jets! They have to do it, right? The Dolphins can't win the division after going 1-15. I have to pick them

New England (-5.5) over Buffalo- The Pats will be paying more attention to the Jets score than they will to this game

Seattle (+7) over Arizona- The Cardinals haven’t had anything to play for in like 8 weeks. Holmgren gets the victory in his finale, or at least keeps it close

San Francisco (-3) over Washington

San Diego (-8) over Denver- the Chargers will rout the Broncos becoming the first 4-8 team to make the playoffs. Shanahan will be fired after this collapse, and the whole region of New England will have a battle royale with San Diego because if they get in and the Pats don’t, heads are going to roll!

Last Week: like I said, doesn’t matter
Season: I’m just focusing on next year

Never Give Up!

Well, here is the long and the short of it. I’m not going to beat around the bush anymore. It’s all over for me. Last week, I went 6-9, leaving my season record at an abysmal 64-99-2. Now the question is where do I go from here? Do I give up, pack it in and call it quits? Or do I suck it up and stick it out like a man? Hell, I have an audience to please, and I sure as hell am not going to disappoint them! I’m sure some of you take enjoyment out of my struggles. Either way, you the reader deserve a post to read, and by God that’s just what I am going to give you. Oh… yeah…you’re going to have to wait for tomorrow night for that because I’ve been too distracted by college basketball all day. Wait, and maybe the fact that I’m going to the Pats game tomorrow baby! Who’s going to be on the field for pre-game warm ups? THIS GUY! Tomorrow you will be able to feast upon my 2008 Underachievers/Disappointments team. In the meanwhile, wrap your minds around these picks:

Pittsburgh (-2) over Tennessee
Kansas City (+3.5) over Miami
New England (-8) over Arizona
Cincinnati (+3) over Cleveland
Philadelphia (-4.5) over Washington
San Francisco (-5) over St. Louis
Minnesota (-3.5) over Atlanta
New Orleans (-7) over Detroit
Carolina (+3.5) over NY Giants
Seattle (+3.5) over NY Jets
Houston (-7) over Oakland
Denver (-6.5) over Buffalo
Tampa Bay (-3.5) over San Diego

Last Week: doesn’t matter
Season: who cares anymore

The Tyrannic Rule of the BCS is OVER!

This is depressing. I’ve realized that pretty much all hope is lost of me accomplishing my goal of reaching the .500 mark for the season. Now I need a miracle that would rival the one that occurred on ice roughly 28 years ago. Last week I had my hands tied with it being finals week and everything. I know I said that I don’t do work and school is not an issue and all that junk, but even I had my hands tied last week. I’m proud to say that I survived finals week, but I paid the price. If you want to know how, look at my record at the bottom of this post. Last week I only had time to pick the 4 pm. games and later, and it was not pretty. Actually, based on that it’s probably better that I didn’t have a chance to predict the one o’ clock games. I think I may have unintentionally cut my losses.

(Also, I’d like to apologize for this week being a little late, but I got home Friday evening and didn’t have power back until midnight last night. My laptop battery lasts roughly 5-10 seconds, making it a little tough on me to make this post before now. But seriously, I’m just glad I survived. I felt like Bear Grylls in the episode where he takes on the Siberian forest terrain. It was awful.)

Today is a great day. I don’t mean today as in this very day, but like the present. Why? One reason: Cincinnati v. Virginia Tech in the FedEx Orange Bowl. Half of you are scratching your heads right now and half of you probably want to fight me, but before you make up your mind and stop reading, let me explain. While outwardly this game is the worst game in the history of BCS bowls, it is also the best. This will be the worst game that has ever aired on national television; a complete waste of the network airwaves. The only people who will be watching this game are Bearcat or Hokie alums, or perhaps a relative of one of the players (a close relative, because I know if I was on one of these teams my dad most likely wouldn’t bother wasting 3 hours of his time). What I can hope for in this game is an incredibly boring performance that displays just how bad each of these teams are. I’m talking about a 13-3, 14-3, or 17-7 final or something like that; you don’t want it within one possession because that could cause some excitement. I guess that being said, 9-0 would be the optimal final. Oh, and some turnovers, not too many, but a moderate amount. And no one has even semi-impressive stats. The BCS tried to save themselves by putting these two teams in the same bowl and not wasting 2 games and 6 hours worth of national television, but essentially they have created the perfect storm. Hopefully, I pray, this storm capsizes the BCS and leads to its eventual demise. Who airs this game? ABC? They must be kicking themselves in the ass for signing that contract.

I don’t want to waste too much of my time or your time talking about the NHL, but can someone help me understand Sean Avery’s suspension? Like, seriously, huh? Am I the only one completely perplexed by this? He didn’t do anything! When Sage Steele warned viewers that what they were about to hear may be offensive and disturbing, I was prepared for something extravagant. I was ready for something really juicy that would blow me away and have me on the ground laughing, or with my jaw dropped in shock. Granted, I chuckled a bit when Avery said “sloppy seconds,” but afterwards I was still waiting there in front of the TV, thinking there was more to come. I was more offended by Sage Steele telling me I might be offended than I actually was by Avery’s comments. In a league that not only allows fights but encourages them, saying “sloppy seconds” gets you a 6-game suspension? I’m really not sure what kind of image the NHL is going for, but this contradictory behavior is turning me further off from hockey. If anything Avery should be rewarded for bringing attention to the NHL. Maybe give him a penalty shot to start off a game or something. If that were the case and that’s the way the league operated, I know I’d start watching.

One last thing I would like to point out, and it is a sweet point for me indeed. I cannot help but notice that the stars are aligning for the return of the Patriots dynasty. Both Romeo Crennel and Charlie Weiss are on creepily similar paths toward being fired by the end of next season. Brady will be back for next season, but one has to assume that it may take a season of adjustment to get back to his MVP form, which is fine because it will take another season for the Pats to solidify up those holes on defense and bring in some younger talent. That way, the Pats will be in prime form by the time Weiss and Crennel are fired, and they will be free to return to their natural places at Belicheck’s side, as offensive and defensive coordinators respectfully. Ah, yes, it is all clear to me now. The New England Patriots, 2010-11 Super Bowl Champions!

Picks:

Green Bay (-3) over Jacksonville
Indianapolis (-17) over Detroit
Washington (-7) over Cincinnati
Atlanta (-5) over Tampa Bay
San Francisco (+5.5) over Miami
Seattle (-2) over St. Louis
Buffalo (+7.5) over NY Jets
Tennessee (-3) over Houston
Baltimore (-3) over Pittsburgh
Carolina (-8) over Denver
Minnesota (+3.5) over Arizona
San Diego (-5.5) over Kansas City
New England (-7) over Oakland
NY Giants (+3) over Dallas
Cleveland (+14) over Philadelphia

Last Week: 2-6
Season: 58-90-2

NY Jets (-4) over San Francisco

Miami (+1) over Buffalo

Denver (-9) over Kansas City

St. Louis (+14) over Arizona

Dallas (+3.5) over Pittsburgh

New England (-7) over Seattle

Baltimore (-6) over Washington

Tampa Bay (+3) over Carolina

Last Week: 7-6
Season: 56-84-2

To Be Continued...

Unfortunately I don’t have time to write anything interesting this week. I really do have things to do with my life. I just spent almost three hours driving back to school so all I had time to do when I got back is write a little something for each game. I did make my picks yesterday, but I know people aren’t very trustful of others and I would lose all credibility if took the time to give my thoughts on the Thanksgiving games and made this post after the first set of games. I will get my two cents in this week though. You can bet the Lions are going to get some heat from me as well as McNabb. Yeah, that’s right, McNabb. I don’t care about how you did on Thursday, I’m not done with you yet. You’ve actually added fuel to my fire.

NY Jets (-8) over Denver

Let me be clear that this pick is NOT me jumping on the Jets bandwagon, but more of me jumping on the Broncos dilapidated rickshaw that is a sorry excuse for a bandwagon. They rival the Eagles for the most inconsistent, hardest-to-read team. They’ve beaten New Orleans, Tampa Bay, Atlanta, and San Diego, yet have lost to Kansas City, Oakland, and Jacksonville. I’m not completely sold on the Jets yet, but after their performances in the last two weeks this seems like an easy pick.

Buffalo (-6.5) over San Francisco

I’m going with tradition on this one, in that it is very hard for opponents to win in Buffalo in December (it basically is). And that goes especially for a 3-8 west coast team, despite the Bills recent struggles. Their offense explosion last week gives me hope they can pull this one out by at least a touchdown.

New Orleans (+4) over Tampa Bay

The Saints pretty much have to win this game to keep their playoff hopes alive, and Drew Brees is a big time performer. He was my runner-up for MVP last week, and he certainly could win that award this year, but not if the Saints don’t make the postseason. They beat Tampa in their first matchup, and I’m going to bet that the Bucs defenders take at least a half to adjust to Brees after facing a Culpepper-lead Lions offense last week.

Green Bay (-3) over Carolina

This pick is very similar to the Buffalo one, in that opponents don’t go into Green Bay in December (it basically is) and come away with a victory. It’s also a play of percentages- Carolina: 6-0 at home, 2-3 on the road. Green Bay is a better team than 5-7, where a loss would put them.

NY Giants (-3.5) over Washington

The G-men are unfortunately the best team in football, and Washington has faded from the early season glory they showed. Granted that has been in part to Portis being banged up, but I don’t foresee a divisional grudge match here. Giants will win easily.

St. Louis (+7) over Miami

Steven Jackson is finally back for that Rams. Don’t get me wrong, St. Louis was never a good team, but they were competitive with Jackson. When he was completely healthy they beat Washington and Dallas, and gave the Pats a good game. Jackson is like an iron supplement for the Rams anemic offense. Combine that with the fact that Miami has screwed me the last couple times I picked them to cover (Oakland, Seattle) and I’ll take the Rams at home.

Baltimore (-7) over Cincinnati

Everyone saw what the Raven’s defense did to McNabb and the Eagles last week. This game won’t be much different. What are the odds of Ed Reed scoring more points than the entire Bengals team?

Indianapolis (-4.5) over Cleveland

I would hate to be a Browns fan. They don’t even know how to use the little talent they have. Brady Quinn is out for the season; Indy is rounding into postseason shape; all signs point to a Colts W.

Atlanta (+6) over San Diego

I think this is a fairly generous spread for the Falcons. I would like to highlight the subplot of Michael Turner returning to his old stomping grounds, where he served as a backup to LT for 4 seasons, watching him shatter the record books. Now that Turner has his time in the spotlight, he leads the league in touchdowns and is third in rushing yards. I’m a big believer in players shining in situations like this, and although there’s no hard feeling towards San Diego, I’m sure he wants badly to run all over them.

New England (-2) over Pittsburgh

As a Pats fan, this is it. This is the game. This game will answer the following questions: Is Matt Cassell for real? Are we going to contend for a title this year? Should we get excited for the remainder of the season, or just go back into sleep mode like we did when Brady got hurt? This is also a big game in terms of making the playoffs. The Jets have an easy schedule, and we need to keep up with Indy and Baltimore for the wild card spots.

Oakland (-3) over Kansas City

Umm, don’t really care about this game. It could be interesting, and I’ll be interested for fantasy purposes (Tony Gonzalez). Both teams scored 31 points last week, but KC let up 54 to a previously heartless Buffalo offense and Oakland held Denver to 10.

Minnesota (-3.5) over Chicago

The Vikings really are good. They are. Everyone hates on them because their starting quarterback is Gus Frerotte, which is understandable. But seriously, try and look past the fact that he is their QB. If you can ignore that, you will see they are a good team. I like them to win the North.

Houston (-3) over Jacksonville

Another game that no one should really care about. I like Houston because they are at home and I want to believe that Andre Johnson is going to have a huge fantasy performance for me; I’m going to need it. At least Houston limits their problems to on the football field. They have that working in their favor.

Last week: 10-4-1
Turkey: 2-1
Season: 49-78-2